New "It's Lovely!" HQ

Oh my god, this is wonderful. It was found by Gav who, I'm guessing from his Austin Powers comment, thought it was shagtastic. But I love it! Really! It's excellent! Look! It's like a museum, or a Dwell photo spread!

I'm buying it and moving in and keeping it that impeccably clean. I'll use an orange rotary phone, and listen to LPs, and look things up in World Book. I shall cook meals involving cans of condensed soup.

And then I'm going to hang up portraits of Kim Il Sung and Kim Jong-il in every room, just to finish the look.

"BUYERS ARE TO ASSURE THEMSELVES"

I don't see anything upsetting at all in this listing that Jessi found. Nope, nope, it's all fluffy white clouds. Tra la la...

Holland: Land of Tanning Beds

This houseboat was found by Sue, who thinks it's a retirement home for circus folk. The tent-like roof; the King Tut mask; the mirrors; where to begin? (Click through for the bathroom with the wall mounted TV, the tanning bed, and the gnomes and Native American Buddha around the tub.) But oddly enough, my eye is caught by the flower arrangement above. Are those two fly swatters sticking out of it?

Victorian Victorian

Christine found this classy B&B. Nothing says "worth almost a million bucks" like porn on the walls!

Plus we have an old friend dropping by. Perhaps the chair had made a reservation for the B&B, and wasn't notified about the changes:

Princess Leia's vacation cabin

This house, found by Suzanne, is where holograms come to kick back on weekends. They wipe their hologram feet when they first come in so they don't get hologram mud on the hologram carpet, then they relax on the hologram sofa with the hologram throw cushions.

Don't look over there, look over here

Adrian found this listing. What's the big deal? Nice yard...


Fine bedroom...



AHHHHHHHHHHH!


Not only was there a terrible fire, but ohmygod isn't that a walker there to the right? Could they not get that out of the way before taking the photo?

All you need to know

If you were going to have only one photo for a listing, would this be the one you chose? Of course! What else could people be curious about? True I can't tell what this is a photo of, but I've never been to Utah. I'm sure it makes sense to locals.

Found by a real estate professional who wishes to remain anonymous.