The carpet needs a haircut

The telephone's out of cigarettes, and the balcony is on the make,
And the piano has been drinking, the piano has been drinking...

...and another thing...

What can this sign on the toilet possibly say? I can't think of anything other than "DOES NOT WORK" or "DO NOT USE" or, at a stretch, "WATER NOT TURNED ON -- TOILET NOT FUNCTIONING." These people have managed to go on for nine or ten paragraphs.

tsk tsk

Oh, chair, what have you done? Why did Sockempress find you having a time out in the corner?

Well, one minute for each year. We'll see tonight.

Gotta go! Pie's in the oven!

*vroom*

Here's a listing! Katt found it! No time to get out of the car -- gotta get to the in-laws before Cousin Barb eats all the cranberry sauce! See ya!

*vroom*

Home Sweet Home

How could you not want to live here? Doesn't this photo make you think of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies, kittens playing with balls of yarn, and the family coming together for Thanksgiving?

Yeah, me neither.

Even more help is on the way

What's that? You were getting cold while playing the piano outside? Don't worry -- Hanne found a fireplace to keep you warm.

Circle of life (or death)

The hula hoop has come to the funeral parlor to pay its respects. Overcome with grief, it collapses on the floor. (Thanks to Mandy for finding this tragic portrait.)