OH HI GUYS WHAT ARE YOU DOING

Probably it's because I read 1984 at an impressionable age, but this listing (found by Susan) is giving me the creeps. Why is the TV watching the bed? Why won't it go away? Please go away, TV. Please give the nice people some privacy.

P.S. I know I've been sent this before, but I can't find the original e-mail or any post I made from it. So apologies to whoever sent it. And more apologies if I'm repeating myself. And I apologize for that parking job -- I really could've done better. And I'm sorry that I don't always wash the empty containers properly before I put them in the recycling bin. And I'm sorry that I'm using such small type here. It must really be hard on your eyes.

This one's for all the parents out there

OK, parents, 'fess up: you've done it, too, right? Look under the table to see what I'm talking about.

But -- and it's a big but -- here's the difference. Have you ever left a diaper on the floor and then listed your house on the interweb machines for everyone (including Kati, who found it) to see?

Oh.

You have?

Sorry.

Carry on.

Exterminate! Exterminate! With marshmallows on top!

Run, stove, run! Oh no... it didn't make it out in time.

Who could've done such a terrible thing? Why, it was none other than the evil YAMBOT. Half sweet potato, half robot, all villain.

(Found by Be This Way.)

Greetings from Me-Kwa-Mooks

Yes, this is what all real estate listings look like here in Seattle. Some day we will build houses, but for now it's just boats.

Hangin' out at the Gas 'n' Sip

Heather found this sofa convention. Why not include it in the listing? They're not hurting anyone. Hanging out, just hanging out.

This little room from the same listing, however... I don't want to know what happens in there, I really don't. Please don't tell me. I'm just going to say it's a pie safe and leave it at that.

Not included: cobbler

Ooh! Blackberry bushes! How unusual! Sold -- I'll take it!

Someone didn't get the memo

"Uh, Toaster Oven? Yeah, we were all kind of going for a theme, you know? Phone wore its dial, and Cabinets all came with their steel fronts. Even Bathroom Floor agreed to dress up in pink and gray. So... what I'm saying... look, it's nothing personal, but toaster ovens don't really go with what we're trying to do, okay? So, if you wouldn't mind just, you know, going for a walk or something? Thanks, man. No hard feelings, right?"

(Via Metafilter.)