Hey, Trin? There's something someone wanted you to know, but was too shy to tell you in person so instead he wrote it on a wall, listed the house for sale, made sure Cathy would find it and send it to me, and hoped you would see it here.
Sorry, Trin. That's a tough way to find out. And on St. Valentine's Day, too.
Found on delete yourself (<-- possibly not safe for work, or breakfast) by Tristan: this sexxy studio apartment. Nothing says "I'm getting lucky tonight" like painting "clothes off!" or "f*ck me I'm famous" on the walls. But more to the point -- how much does a gallon of white paint cost? It's a studio apartment (with 2.5 rooms, in the intriguing style of NYC listings). It would take, what, one morning to slap some paint over those mottoes.
Ah well, maybe the next buyer of the $399,000 studio will be just as happy to nestle into his or her bed under the inspiring call to arms of "sexx laws." (Can I be reading that right? What does that mean? Is it a 1984 reference?)
Here's the worst part: that "*" in the "f*ck." So timid, so pointless. I hate half-assed swearing. Go hard or go home, that's what I say!
Wait, you already are home.
I see your problem.
Kelsey found this listing -- and I found D.B. Cooper!
Quick! Swoop in! Get him! Who would've guessed he'd turn up in Kansas?
Nothing to see here, folks. Just a listing, found by by Andrea. Move along, move along.
"Talk to me, Chair! Can't we work this through?" cried the plastic tub. But no. Chair had seen too much -- my God, the things the tub would hold! -- to continue.
The house was put up for sale; Chair and the tub went their separate ways.
(Tragic listing found by samahs.)
Househunter Christina found this potential new home. The photo above is one of four in the listing; therefore we can determine that 25% of the house looks like this. And okay, yeah, it would be a little weird to begin every day with a cigar-store Indian and a rabid wolverine staring at me over my raisin bran, but ohmygod did you see that price? $13,900! That's, like, one month's property taxes around here, not the price of an entire house (wolverine included). Buy it, Christina! Buy it!
This sensible bit of plumbing was found by Tania. Rather than going through all the bother of installing a waste pipe, you can just use the drain for your bath, shower, and toilet! So practical! And a time-saver, too: you can perform all your morning ablutions simultaneously.
