You should see how much the steering wheel costs

Yours for just $18,000: this three bed, one bath side-view mirror!

(Found by needled. Row!)

Falls down lighter! And fluffier!

OK, yes, it's a popcorn ceiling and chances are it's full of Chrysotile. I can see how you might think that was bad. (Apparently the residents don't, because they seem to still be using this room to keep your clothes in.) But look! It's self-removing! Wait long enough and it will all peel down, saving you thousands of dollars in asbestos-abatement fees!

Swab the decks! And don't forget the living room.

I'm sure there's a perfectly good reason for a garden hose to be running in the front door...


...and through the living room. Like... ah... well, there could be a fire in the kitchen. That would require a hose, wouldn't it? Or maybe... um... well, wait. Maybe I'm looking at this the wrong way. Maybe the hose isn't going in the front door, it's going out it. Really the water is going from the... waterbed? to the... garden? Or something?

clap clap clap clap

The lawns at night are green and bright
In the listings of Texas
Reminds me of mumble mumble mumble... glove?
In the listings of Texas

(Found by Maggie)

Mutant Listing

From Linda comes this mutant hand reaching toward whoever's on the pot. Grr! Argh!

Stop picking on the poor Realtors

Poor, poor real estate agents. Not only are home sales down by mumble percent from last year and mumble percent of mortgages are underwater or upside-down or cattywompas, but then they get houses like this one they have to try to come up with listings for. Poor dears.

(Found by Rachel.)

Charge!

Get it! Rar! Attack the bush! Don't let it near the house -- I think it's trying to steal our cinderblocks!