Not included: squished witch

Are you a good listing, or a bad listing?

(Found by Corey.)

Fine with me.

I was going to say something cutting about including this photo in a real estate listing, but c'mon. These Realtors are armed. Like, with guns, real guns. All I have to defend myself is a three-inch-deep layer of Lego scattered by the front door -- and let's face it, these guys probably don't live in shoes-off houses. So: keep it up! Great listing! Good luck!

"San Diego Home with Charm"

If the charms don't work, try prayer. And if prayer doesn't work... well, you've always got your backup plan.

(Found by Heather.)

Included: butter, salt

For the family that likes popcorn. Really, really likes popcorn... Okay, wait, time for a sanity check. This probably makes no sense to anyone other than me. Here, this is what I'm thinking of:

See it? See it? It's not just me, right?

Huh.

Oh dear.

I'm going to go lie down in a nice dark room until this passes. I may be some time.

Little boxes, in the bathroom, little boxes filled with I-don't-know-what

My house suffers from Pink Bathtubitis too, so I really shouldn't raise an eyebrow at this listing Karen found. What are you going to do, after all? You've got a house to sell, the bathroom is pink, you're not going to remodel. All you can do is carefully frame the photo so you get in your collection of collections and hope for the best.

It carries its listing on its back

When my husband saw I had this listing, found by Caedmon, up on my computer, he asked "Why do you hate turtles? Why do you hate chihuahuas? They're so cute. Why do you hate them? Why?"

I'm sorry, turtle and chihuahua. Go about your yippy, slow ways. I will say nothing bad about you. Go! Go now, before I change my mind!

What... a... dump.

Don't click on that photo Philip found. Don't do it. You'll regret it. Trust me. Just don't. Don't don't don't. Go do something else. Maybe a nice walk? Or cookies, you could make cookies. The hallway closet always needs cleaning.

There are many, many things other than clicking on that photo you could do, and I suggest that you go do them all.