Not included: corpse
Nothing to see here, folks. Just a listing, found by by Andrea. Move along, move along.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
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Loveliness past
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2009
(358)
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February
(34)
- This Listing: Now with More White Power!
- "Serene small town living"
- You should see how much the steering wheel costs
- Falls down lighter! And fluffier!
- Swab the decks! And don't forget the living room.
- clap clap clap clap
- Mutant Listing
- Stop picking on the poor Realtors
- Charge!
- ...for certain definitions of "motivated."
- Ve haff vays of making you buy the Haus
- "Fixer! Fixer! Fixer!"
- "This home needs some TLC"
- X
- Oh, Eth, how we'll miss you.
- Please bring the flag
- Poor Trin. Or maybe Tkin.
- You have much luck with that?
- Pssst. Any FBI agents reading this?
- Not included: corpse
- The end of the listing.
- Spiderman, a wolverine, and an Indian walk into a ...
- Dual-purpose plumbing
- Lullabye... and goodnight...
- This post qualifies for Energy Star
- KKKlassy!
- Come back!
- This is how I get to work every morning
- For Fido the giraffe
- Measure once, cut once
- It's just there to add a dash of color
- I'm too sleepy to be mean
- A rovin', a rovin
- A for effort
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February
(34)
38 comments:
That has got to be THE poorestly chosen picture for a listing EVER.
Is "poorestly" a word?
"Extremely motivated seller". I imagine so.
I especially like how the listing says "Seller extremely motivated." I wonder why...
OMG....yes, I can see how as the listing indicates "Seller extremely motivated". Yikes.
Oh, my. And nobody thinks the toddler triplets got into the Crayola paint? And the dog needed there baths to get it off? Whew. I have to imagine that or I'll have nightmares for a week.
Yikes, poor house. You know, people my age usually have a few things in common. We remember Pretty in Pink coming out, and going to the roller rink in middle school. "All skate! Ha! I remember that!" As well as some other less wholesome things.
There's going to be an entire generation of teenagers who have the unifying memory of all those times they broke into the vacant houses of California, Michigan, etc. "Hey, remember how we'd break in an trash the desperately needed assets of struggling families??" "Good times! Woo!"
Considering the back door seems to be boarded over and nailed shut, I assume this is where the killer got in....
I'm looking for the chalk outline of the body...
You should have a "worst picture of the year" thing where we could vote for the worst pictures...this would be one of the nominees for sure.
are they trying to sell this house? seriously!
this is the best of the worst.
"Seller extremely motivated" because he's on trial and needs money for is $500 an hour defense attorney.
Even looking at the sub-flooring would be better than that. I can't beleive they left the carpet down.
Maybe this in the interier of the house that had the corpse in the driveway.
At least they took down the yellow police tape.
Paint. It's gotta be paint. I need it to be paint.
Anyway, blood would have turned browner by the time the police tape was gone, wouldn't it?
Oh God! ewwwwww!that's horrible!
How about that big mirror next to the bathtub!
Let's hope that's actually a Kool-Aid stain. Yucky.
Clearly it's where someone dropped the bucket of red paint they were using to flank the fireplace in the other photo.
or is it...
I am disturbed to see that there are also spots on the floor in the bathroom. Maybe they should have used some of their motivation to clean the floor or change the carpet.
Blood turns brown as it dries... which is pretty quickly.
I'm thinking it's red paint.
But still... they just left it?
And why is the back door boarded up?
Why is the seller "extremely motivated"?
Why, why, why?
This is a place where a little Photoshop could work magic. A little clone stamp here, some healing brush there. And voila, you've turned a murder scene into a plain boring living room.
I was surprised not to see a mound of fresh dirt in the back yard!
Hey ! Whadda ya #$*&in' looking at ? There ain't a !@$% thing there... you get that ? DO YOU ?! I thought so. We'll have the 'crew' visit you later to make &^#* sure there's nothin' to see. And there won't be nothin'. Right ? Right.
could be fresh blood.
For some reason, I'm reminded of the suburban house scene in George Romero's Diary of the Dead. I fully expect to see Deb's dead little brother nailed to the wall with an arrow, and his mother lying alongside from where she just finished eating the neighbors. Kuh-REEPY.
Considering the house JUST sold in September for close to the same price, I have to wonder what the motivation is here... Besides moving out of "kraprooM", which is what the local kids call that rural town!
This a rare photo where a tiny bit of Photoshop magic wouldn't have been a bad idea.
The door is open. The white light beckons. Move on, children...move toward the liiiighhht...aaall are welllcome...
Red Rum.
That looks like every vacation I've taken in the past 3 years...
"Seller extremely motivated!"
I'm sure he's dying to sell.
I bet the real estate agent's going to make a killing on this sale.
Heck, I might even take a stab at making an offer.
(Oh, and Jimcy says it looks like there was a "Muurdur")
I agree with the person who said it's the red paint from the room with the fireplace.
But STILL - why wouldn't you have cleaned that up???
"You left the TOILET SEAT UP AGAIN!! Now I have to kill you, darling!! Why did you do it?? Why couldn't you put it down???"
I'm just hoping that some careless child dropped his Fruit Punch Slurpee on the floor shortly before the family moved out...
Is this Scott Peterson's house? Drew Peterson's? OJ's? Lizzie Borden, maybe?
Wow....real estate agent moonlighting as a police officer & too lazy to retake photos? Yikes!!
"After the bludgeoning we dragged his limp, bleeding body across the living room to the trunk of the car for a stealthy disposal."
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