I'll sell you this house for... one MILLION DOLLARS!
(Look in the top right corner.)
My books: available for very, very little money
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Loveliness past
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2008
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July
(93)
- The Human Tetris -- play along at home!
- For you action / adventure fans
- It's Christmas in July!
- Solves the whole "WHICH cabinet?" problem
- "Pick up this gem, dust it off, add polish and it ...
- A well-defended house
- Don't break the house! By Milton Bradley
- "toilet installed, not to code"
- Can I offer you a glass of ice tea?
- KEEP OUT --no, not you! You, come in.
- Open door slowly
- Squawk II
- An old (very old) friend
- Tin foil? Radiators? Art? Please explain.
- Special bendy house
- Excuse me, could you please scootch down... just a...
- Really, it's totally my house to sell, I swear
- Half a horse is better than... no, wait, that does...
- Included: a ghost. Well, no, just half a ghost.
- I once bought a house that was THIS BIG
- "nice little place dont have time to list first co...
- "Candle in the Wind" was probably playing in the b...
- Toga! Toga! Toga!
- How? How does this happen?
- (I don't want to swim in) Chelsea
- Aaaahhhhhhhh!
- Yeah, nothing awkward about this at all
- Suicide girls
- I shop at Ikea, too!
- Because I'm comfortable here, damn it, that's why
- Yip!
- Smells delicious!
- Come and knock down our door (doo-dee doo-dee doo ...
- Is it my contacts?
- Squeak!
- "GREAT VALUE! REDUCED PRICE!!!"
- Rented a tent, a tent, a tent
- Run, bathtub, run!
- Note to self...
- An explanation.
- "THIS IS NOT A REO WRECK OR FIXER UPPER"
- Shows what I know.
- I'll burn you!
- TV eye
- "City says stay out."
- Just out of frame: a pterodactyl opening cans
- Ow. Ow. Ow. Quit poking me!
- One fish, two fish... no, wait, never mind, just o...
- Nothing good ever happened here.
- Poke it! Go on!
- Peek-a-boo!
- If I had a spare two million...
- Immaculate
- Hi... er... don't let us bother you...
- Good... doggy?
- At least the lid is down.
- Oooooohhhh....
- I do not think it means what you think it means.
- zzzzz
- A time-saving technique
- Hop hop hop smash
- Lemme out!
- 500 mirrors in the house and yet I go out dressed ...
- Comes with walls. And a floor.
- *squints*
- They sell disposable cameras at the drug store, yo...
- Butter? Parquet!
- It gives a lovely light
- Fine -- I'll do it myself
- Do you suppose all Earth creatures behave like tha...
- Hey, what's under the tarp?
- UP and down, and UP and down...
- Dum de dum de dum...
- C'mon, lamp! Come with us!
- "FHA rehabilitation loan is adviseable on this pro...
- I LOVE YOU TINA
- PLEASE "CLEAN" THE SINK WHEN YOU ARE "DONE"
- Major selling point: trash can lids.
- It's a golden housing-market
- In an average American home, the TV is on more tha...
- Drunk tank pink
- The Realtor slipped me a mickey
- I'll sell you this house for... one MILLION DOLLARS!
- Included: oven, fridge, surly teenager
- For keeping kosher?
- Double wide. Double!
- Once again: aaaacentuate the positive...
- Winchester Split-Level of Mystery
- Mine? Really? Why, thank you!
- The importance of planning ahead
- My first thought is not "I'll take a refreshing dip!"
- Squawk!
- Dreary. So very dreary.
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July
(93)
7 comments:
OMG...is that Austin Powers? Can I buy his house?!?
OMG thats AWESOME!!!! this site is histerical!
wow is that where he used to live in? ..before or after he became ridiculously rich?
wow is that where he used to live in? ..wish it came with Beyonce too haha
I seriously jumped out of my seat when I looked in the corner. I was too focused on the army of stuffed bears on the back of the couch...
Sculling back through your old posts while in bed ill, this one made me burst out laughing before launching into a very painful coughing fit. Totally worth it.
That guy totally freaked me out like some Halloween trick. Don't want to see that again.
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