Sunday, August 17, 2008

A doomed romance


"But I love you, Stove! Why won't you come to my soft embrace?"

"It will never work, Sofa. I'm made of metal and my only goal in life is to get really hot. You're made of some weird fabric and highly flammable. I'm so sorry, but you have to go."

12 comments:

David said...

a lovely mini-mansion with "sewer available". hmmmm, doesn't strike me as an optional thing.

Don said...

@david:

It's an amenity! When, after running next door to use the neighbor's bathroom, you don't like their decor, there are alternatives, like digging up the front yard and street and connecting to the municipal system, allowing you to hook up all those new-fangled fixtures in your own bathroom!

The photo is a great feature in itself. It shows just where the house fire will start when someone actually uses the stove.

Charlene said...

David, lots of houses aren't connected to municipal sewers, especially those not right in town or in areas of permafrost. They either have septic tanks or daily pickup of liquid waste in covered buckets known as honeypots.

Anonymous said...

Something doesn't add up right. The outside shots both show 1 brick fireplace chimney and no metal woodstove chimneys. But this inside shot shows 1 metal woodstove and no brick fireplaces.
Either:
1) These are 2 different houses;
2) There is a fireplace in another room, but this woodstove pipe just fills the attic with smoke.

-Alan

Charlene said...

What is it with woodstoves? Do homeowners not understand the meaning of the words "building code"?

Anonymous said...

I can only pray that Charlene is kidding about the honeypots...

Lulu LaBonne said...

I adore these furniture romances, I now leave my furniture arranged so they can get on better while I'm out

Charlene said...

I kid you not, sir. In many cities in the Canadian North (including where I'm from), you put out the family honeypots in the morning for the honeywagon.

Imagine my surprise when I learned what Americans refer to as a "honeypot".

Meg said...

You know, it's kind of a cute house. It's little, but a single person could make it kind of cute, right? Needs some work in the kitchen, okay...not a huge deal. But then I look at this picture with the stove and sofa and I suddenly feel so sad. What a depressing picture. If I wasn't a Muggle, I could see the Dementor sitting on the sofa.

Okay, Charlene. I'll bite. What exactly does one do with the "solid" waste? *shudder*

Dave said...

Charlene is correct. I've spent some time in Alaska, and the truck that comes by to, um, suck out your holding tank, is called the "honey wagon."

Charlene said...

By "liquid waste", I mean feces, urine, vomit, dirty water left over from cleaning, etc., etc. In some communities leftovers and food waste go into the honeypot too.

Now imagine having a 500 gallon water tank on the side of your house because there's no running water either. Ah, the Territories.

Theresa said...

Eventually the stove did give in to his burning desire for the sofa... it ended quickly, in a fiery blaze.
T