Thursday, August 7, 2008

Just one or two things left to do


"The property does need some aesthetic work but almost all major stuff has been done by us. All it needs a is a roof leak fixed, Some paint and drywall, And ceiling tiles put in. Other then that it is pretty much perfect."

Oh... I can't stop quoting. Hold on: "And remember cash talks, bullshit walks. I am more then willing to be reasonable, but waste My time and I'll waste yours... The only reason We are selling it is to get out of Maine, Call us crazy but We prefer a good state."

Found by M Wms.

36 comments:

Tiffany said...

Oh my god, I'm rolling laughing because before I even read the post, I looked at the picture and thought, "Wow that could be Maine - I've seen houses like that here." Yeah - I've seen that very house!

Fnarf said...

I wish there was a link to the listing. I'd like to offer the guy $150 for it, see what he says.

Anonymous said...

Goodbye then. . .Don't let the door hit your @ss on the way out!

FarmWife said...

Gosh yes! This listing so makes me want to invest my savings in this lovely home & move to the wonderful state of Main. Why wouldn't it?!

Sara said...

Sorry, fnarf, I forgot. The link's there now.

Moltz said...

Yes, this is such a great market for a seller to be throwing his weight around! Good luck with that! And you can see why they'd want to get the hell out of Maine what with it being a fricking postcard every 300 yards.

kirsten said...

Gotta love Craig's list

The Divine Miss M said...

Holy crap.

So, from a South African living in London - what is so wrong with Maine?

green-minded person said...

Oh i love this one too --

"That means You can open a business here, Or just live in it. Fix it and resell it or whatever."

And this --

"If You want to nit-pick every detail then go away. If You aren't really interested but want to look, Go away."

*sigh*

Ms. Moose said...

Ha! Love that there are no interior pictures. How serious can a buyer really get without seeing the inside? Worst shell game ever.

GloamingDesigns said...

ok then, i'm calling them crazy.

Meg said...

Call me crazy, but that ad makes me want to check it out! I want to meet this hick and look in the house out of trainwreck curiosity. And to see if I can guess what bill collectors he's running from.

Oh, and Miss M, there's nothing wrong with Maine. It's beautiful.

Amanda said...

"Please ignore the bloodstains on the wall, the house came with them."

Tom Clancy said...

Comes with coffee brandy, brutha!

Heidi A. said...

Thanks for a good laugh. I needed that today. :)

Crystal said...

O.M.G. Half the listing is quotable - where should I start?
"If You want to nit-pick every detail then go away." (he's worried about PICKY buyers?)

"The first person with 35,000 actual funds gets it." (are people stampeding a path to stake claim to this house or something?)

This was a seriously hilarious find.

remodelingthislife said...

all it needs is some drywall! LOL!!

Anonymous said...

What's wrong with you, you have some objection to home cooked meth?

Anonymous said...

Coffee Brandy - ROFL!! How true is that!

I live in Augusta for which Chelsea claims to be the gateway to according to it's signs :)

P.S. - Maine is gorgeous. Wait 'till this hick figures out that every state has it's own personal downside. There's always someone available to complain about whatever state they are living in.

I just moved here from the deep South - I just wish it would quit raining.

Chubby Chick said...

Maine? I think this guy is from MARS. lol

T said...

gotta love the ones that think they're god and capitalize "We." i totally think they're the bomb.. after all, they're listing their house on craigslist. *bows* ...maybe they couldn't find a real estate agent?

nice grammar too. ;o) gotta love the brains on these ones.

and they wanna live in a good state? something tells me that their standards aren't very high if this is where they lived...

someone hold my hair back - *barfs*

i guess all it needs is a good, solid coat of paint? ..right?

don't go if you aren't thinking of making an offer, because the house is NOT an exhibit to be laughed at.

but... if you like it, check it out, but don't be TOO picky.. they don't want you to think too much about it. yeah, total impulse buy right there.

for that price i'd rather live in a car.

Michael Hamilton said...

I want to meet this guy. Offer him $50, let's see how far that gets me.

Maki said...

Honestly, the quoting is hilarious!!! I'm crying. LOL.

Anonymous said...

I don't see whats wrong with this - surely $35 is a good price for the land alone - you could jsut knock the house down and start over if you wanted

Jayne said...

What a charmer!

Anonymous said...

Do they sell cans of paint in Maine?

Charlene said...

anon, you don't see what's wrong with this? How about the jerk's attitude? Do you honestly think a blowhard like that could be trusted to have listed every problem?

And no, the land might not be worth that much, not if there are problems.

Deb Clague said...

What the heck is wrong with Maine (I'm Canadian and have no idea about any "quirks" it may have other this this idiotic homeseller)?

Anonymous said...

"...All it needs a is a roof leak fixed, Some paint and drywall, And ceiling tiles put in. Other then that it is pretty much perfect."

Yeah, I'm pretty much perfect too. Except that I'm bald, morbidly obese, one-eyed, toothless and extremely flatulent. But, like I said, otherwise PERFECT!

Heather said...

omgosh. i can't believe this.

James said...

Hi there,

I live from a part of Maine (pretty much any town in Androscoggin, Oxford, Lincoln, Kennebec, Knox, Sagadahoc... oh wait... it's EVERYWHERE IN MAINE) that has these types of houses.

My area of Maine typically has a house like this every 3 to 5 houses (if it's not a dead-end road which = development). It's an amazing thing, driving along a road going from point A to B and being able to expect a shitty house like that just beyond the next turn.

Most houses in Maine are nice, but you'll run into those places where "junk salesmen" (seriously, some people put giant trailor-length dumpsters in their front yard and try to sell shit that people dump into 'em) try to make a living, and it just scares the hell out of you. I suppose it's Maine's way of trying to keep Massholes from driving their property rates up (makes me LOL).

Regardless, the owner of this property sounds like a complete sociopath or a slum-lord.

Great blog!

Leisha Camden said...

Somehow I don't think that it's Maine that's the problem here ...

wundermary said...

BWA! Haven't heard "Masshole" since I left RI. Maybe he's from Mars and Maine: Mars Hill! Anyway, this is my personal favorite: "No bullshit or tire kickers."
I'm well aware of how far water can travel once inside and the damage it can cause to your sills. Anyone would be crazy to consider a house with water damage that the owner won't allow them to scruitinize. What a whack job.
Man, I love this blog.

randilee said...

I do believe this is now my favorite website... I can't wait to look at the rest of the houses!!

Gramma Carol said...

I've scanned a lot of the places on this blog and this is THE BEST! HAHAHA! The comments are almost as good as the post.

One can go to any photo site, search "Maine" and see how beautiful it is. Something tells me this guy is the problem...not the state of Maine.

"Massholes"...gotta LOVE IT!

carol said...

I pick this as the winner of the site. LOL